Friday, July 25, 2014

I’m not coming out……

Do you see me? Yes, I am standing in my pantry closet and I am waiting for someone to bring me some food, snacks or something for me to steal. I will wait here all day if I have to and you can’t make me leave. Sometimes in life, you need to stand your ground and be strong in your convictions (whatever those are). Sometimes I want this blog to be about more than just me. I want to be able to share MY wonderful insights and MY opinion of important things and give you advice on stuff because I am super smart! When I am standing in the closet, I am in charge. Unfortunately, I have to depend on others to bring me stuff. Sometimes in life, you have to depend on others even if they are SLOW to bring you what you want. Just in case you don’t know, I am not a super patient dog. See how many important things you learned today just because you read my blog!

Chuck
Oh Wise Impatient One

 
Mom puts everything in giant plastic containers because…well I have a history with  paper bags
…when they're wrapped around food. Sometimes I dream of being a Raccoon.
Nothing stops a Raccoon from getting his dinner.

Friday, July 18, 2014

VOCABULARY TEST

Sometimes my Mom uses words that I think I know, but then it turns out completely different and I get confused. Take for instance the word Pedigree. This is a status that I myself am proud of. My Pedigree means that I am special and that I have come from a great line of amazing Chihuahuas (you knew that right?). Well there is another word that starts with Ped, but it ends with cure. That is right, Pedicure. This word is not so much fun and it doesn’t make me proud, it makes me snarky!  My Mom uses this word because she thinks it makes the idea of trimming my toenails sound like fun. Well it is no fun at all and I let her know just how much I hate it by trying to get in as many bites as I can while she is trying to do it. She in fact will wear big leather gloves so that I can’t get any good bites in. When she does this, I feel like one of those trained birds whose handler must wear gloves to protect themselves from the bird’s sharp talons. Like an eagle or a falcon.  In this case, it is my sharp teeth, but if my toenails haven’t been done in awhile I guess they are sort of like eagle talons. Maybe I should be proud that I am kind of like an eagle and maybe somebody will put pictures of me on flags and money and stuff. I am now feeling proud of my Pedicure!

Chuck

Fly Like an Eagle  
The glove test...
                         

Friday, July 11, 2014

WHO GETS THE LAST WORD?

I hear you people talking sometimes and I just don’t understand the whole process. One person says something, then the other person says something else and it seems like a little battle to get in that last word. This whole exchange could take place with no words at all if you were a dog. My friend Buck and I have a little wordless conversation a couple times per week and it goes something like this…..
We both go outside, he pees, I pee over his pee, he pees over my pee and then I pee over his. So guess who got the last word in? ME! Yes it is true. I am the dog conversation winner. I am the amazing speaker with the urinary vocabulary. If you want to have a meaningful conversation with someone, you should try this. There are usually no arguments, no misunderstandings, and the communication is crystal clear or a little yellow if you no what I mean! So start talking and I bet you can get in the last word! Bottoms up!

CHUCK

Spelling P Champion 2014

Hey, Buck thanks for always letting me get the last word (I am a blogger after all). Love, Chuck

Friday, July 4, 2014

RED WHITE AND CHUCK

Happy 4th of July to all of my friends! While I know there are many festivities and things happening on the big day, I myself will be manning the barbeque. Of course you are all invited to watch my grill magic and I might share some of my grilled food with you. I will then make a monster of a potato salad and I will be making a homemade cheesecake as well. Then to top everything off, I will light up some little Chihuahua size fireworks and set them off for all to see!
The above was an example of my overactive imagination and my secret fantasies that don’t always receive publicity. I don’t suppose it is very realistic to assume that I could actually reach the barbeque and that there would be any potatoes left to make a salad after I snarfed them all up. And please, do you think I would share any of my cheesecake with you? I am all into the holiday spirit, but it doesn’t make me any less of a selfish **$#@!
So Happy 4th of July and may all of your firework/food fantasies come true!

CHUCK

Little Sparkler
My Mom stuck a flag in the picture 'cus of the holiday and all,
not that it's edible, I already tried, it's not. It looks like candy to me what can I say.

Friday, June 27, 2014

INTERLOPER

You my adoring fans would tell me the truth wouldn’t you? Aren’t I the most special, the most loved Chihuahua on the planet? Okay, maybe the whole planet is a bit of a stretch. But who knows? The new little dog at my house is just making herself at home. (At my home!) She runs around all cute and stuff, my parents pick her up because of the cast on her leg. I just wonder if her leg is even really broken at all. It could be a fake cast designed to illicit sympathy and attention. I would resort to that if necessary! Nothing escapes my keen mind and sharp wit. I am going to have to reclaim my territory. The new little dog actually peed on my treat ball. This means war. No one pees on my treat ball and lives to tell about it! I may have to do some defensive peeing of my own. I can’t really hit a target very well, but I can get close! (My Mom will tell you a different story) I may have to resort to some other tactics that involve planting evidence or an undercover food bust. I won’t just sit idly by while the attention that belongs to me goes to some other cute little dog! I will keep you posted on my progress!

Chuck

Territory King                      
This is my Dad (or at least I thought he was) and the new "baby".
Look at her innocent little squinty eyes.
I bet they'll try to buy her some special doggy sunglasses, next!!
This is 'Lacey' and MY friend 'Sabre', undoubtably plotting.
She's probably talking him into peeing on my head, 'cause she's not tall enough to do it herself.