Friday, January 19, 2018

LEGEND OF LAZINESS

Every night I get my treat ball filled with scrumptious snacks. I roll it around on the floor and like magic, the treats fall out and I scarf them up. I have been doing this for years and it is one of the highlights of my day. The only thing that would make it better is if there was a giant ham in my ball that would spill out for me to eat. Anyway, I really enjoy this, but sometimes it is exhausting pushing around a stupid ball. Why can’t I just get the snacks without all of the work. Lately, I push my ball around for a few minutes then I give my Mom that look. You know the one that says “hey, could you please help me out here?” She is so enamored with my charming cute looks that she will sometimes shake the remainder of the treats out for me. Am I good or what?

CHUCK
DO YOU SEE WHY I GET STUFF?
Charming Chihuahua or Master Manipulator?

Friday, January 12, 2018

SNORE LIKE A LION!


NO NOISES HERE!!! TOTALLY QUIET.....
My Mom was totally lying to me! She said that she heard me snoring and that I sounded like a mewling kitten. I am really offended. If I snored, which I don’t, I would sound like a Great Dane or another big dog with a wicked deep snore. There is no way that I could sound like a kitten or cat or any feline. Well maybe a mountain lion, but that would be it. I think my Mom is just pulling my tail and trying to push my buttons. (I don’t know where my buttons are, but you better leave them alone!) Anyway, I am now trying not to sleep when my Mom is around so that she can’t make up stories about my sleeping habits. I think it is rude for people to jest with such a personal thing! Just know that if you hear stupid stories from my Mom, they probably aren’t true. 

CHUCK
Cat Napper

Friday, January 5, 2018

FAD FRONT-RUNNER

PERFECT EXAMPLE OF MY BRILLIANCE

It shouldn’t surprise you to know that everyone wants to be like me. I do something and wa-la, everyone else is doing it too. I am revered amongst so many that it is hard for me to wrap my big head around the concept of being so influential. My latest example is my pen mate Cayenne. She used to sleep on top of me (very annoying) but now she has figured out the under the blanket thing. It is a super good plan and now she has followed my lead and gets under the blanket every chance she gets. I am glad that I could help her be more comfortable and it just makes my head a little bit bigger because I did it first!

CHUCK
Blanket Bandwagon Leader
SOMEONE NEEDS TO TELL CAYENNE IT IS ALL THE WAY UNDER- SHE IS DOING IT WRONG!
LACEY NEEDS TO LEARN THIS TOO.....

Friday, December 29, 2017

HAPPY PEE YEAR!

Every year I try to update you on my New Year’s resolutions. We all know that I have not been successful over the years in trying to change some of my annoying behaviors, so this year I am going to focus on just one thing. Surely, I can reach one little goal, one semi unimportant thing that I would like to change. You are probably thinking that I want to be nicer or kinder to those I love. No, that is not my goal. You might think that I want to reach out more to my fellow dogs in peace and harmony and the answer to that one would be no as well. Here is another no: to eat my food more slowly and enjoy the flavors. None of these are even on my radar of goals or things that I want to change. Now that we have ruled those out, let’s get to the real deal, the big salami (yum) and the heart of the matter. 
I CHUCK THE CHIHUAHUA WOULD LIKE TO REVEAL TO YOU THAT MY NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION IS TO ACTUALLY HIT THE PEE PAD MORE THAN 50% OF THE TIME!
It doesn’t even have to be 90%, but some improvement would make my Mom happy. So, there you go. This is kind of my Mom’s New Year’s resolution for me. I am ok with that since we know all of my resolutions last for about 30 minutes so I don’t feel like I have to be stressed over this. Good luck with your New Year’s goals and if you want to share mine, I would be ok with that too!
THIS PAD IS PRETTY BIG... I CAN DO THIS!


CHUCK
 Temporary Target Practice Expert

Thursday, December 21, 2017

WORSE THAN A LUMP OF COAL

WHAT IF I WEREN'T POKING MY HEAD OUT? YOU WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW I WAS IN HERE UNTIL IT WAS TOO LATE!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Getting me in your stocking is worse than getting the dreaded lump of coal. At least with coal, there is a chance that someone made a mistake or you can just throw it away and hope to do better next year. When you get me, you are getting an entire year of naughtiness and a sure sign that you have been really bad because I am really bad. You are being reprimanded by Santa at the highest level and your entire life will be disrupted. You may get a little break when I am sleeping, but that is about it. The rest of your time will be spent trying to “train” me or to break my bad habits or yell at me with no results. This is the way of life for you if I appear in your stocking. You had better hope that when you come down the stairs Christmas morning you have a pair of socks in your stocking or maybe a candy cane or something else sweet. If it is me, I am not sweet and I do occasionally bite people that I don’t know very well. 

Merry Christmas- (hint: put on some leather gloves when digging around in your big stocking. You never know who might be in there)

CHUCK
Coal Miner

Friday, December 15, 2017

HAM FOR THE HOLIDAYS

I want to promote my newest Christmas Album just in time for the big day. Don’t delay because these things are going to sell like hot cakes (yum). Anyway, this year I have really done something special and as my blog followers you get a little sneak preview of the juicy (yum) hits in store for you….

This is just part of the line up of tunes that you will need to play throughout the holiday season-
“Deck the halls with ham for Chuckie…fa la (yum) la la”  (whatever…)
“We wish you a Merry Ham Fest”
“Grandma wouldn’t have been run over by a reindeer if she would have taken ham to Chuck’s house” (just sayin’)
“Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way. Oh what fun it is for Chuck to eat ham every day” (Yum)

Do you see what I mean? These are some traditional holiday hits hammed up just for you. 

I WILL EVEN DO CAROLING OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE FOR FREE!
CHUCK
Merry Christmas and a Hammy New Year!

Thursday, December 7, 2017

WE INTERRUPT THIS BLOG...

OOOOHHHHMMMM....HHHAAAAAMMMMM
My blog has been interrupted this week because I am meditating on Santa and on becoming a reindeer. It is my goal this year to finally be accepted to the herd. I can be the best Chihuahua reindeer ever and you know that I am a little bit stubborn. Please know that while I am in this state of mediation, I can actually see myself in front of the sleigh with all of the other reindeer and I am fast like the wind. It really helps to do these visualizations when trying to achieve a goal. I am now seeing myself flying through the night over the roof tops and catching a smell as we go by ….what is that smell? It smells like honey baked ham. Ok forget Santa and the other reindeer. I am getting me some ham. I really like this Zen kind of imagination thing that I have going on right now. All I can say is that the ham smell better be real because if I only imagined it, I will be one depressed reindeer!
CHUCK
The Ham Nosed Reindeer!