Friday, April 11, 2014

AAAAAACHOOOOO

Sometimes my Mom calls me Mr. Choo. This could mean that I have a cold. Do dogs get colds? I really don’t know, but I know my Dad had a cold and he had this big thing that pumps out steam with some stuff called Vicks. I felt it was my duty to check it out. I ran into the room before anyone could catch me and stuck my mouth in the little compartment where the Vicks is kept. Wow, that cleared me up right away. No sneezing or snorting, just really clear sinuses (or whatever those are called for dogs). Well, my Mom came running after me and smelled my nose and she went into full blown (pardon the sinus joke) hysterics. She raced me into the kitchen and stuck my whole head under the faucet. This was not a particularly enjoyable experience for me. I was snorting and snuffling and gagging. She was trying to drown me! She then wiped out my mouth with a paper towel, which was rude. So in return, I tried to eat the paper towel while accidentally biting my Mom’s fingers. Oops! Anyway, just moments before, I had a clear head and could breathe perfectly and that changed to a dramatic near drowning for me. Surely there is a law against sticking my head under the faucet. If there isn’t there should be. All I can say is stay away from the Vicks. My Mom still doesn’t know if I actually drank some or just stuck my nose in there and I am not telling.

Chuck

Nearly drowned rat*?!@@#$%

Trust me, you do not need to check out that blue thing over there…it's all clear - Captain Nosey

Friday, April 4, 2014

DON’T SWEAT IT!

Sweatpants! I know you are wondering what I, Chuck would care about sweatpants. It is not like I can wear them myself. I will get to the point in a moment, but first I want to talk about a super fun game for dogs. Tug toys are super fun! You can buy them at pet stores and get them as gifts in a fun pack of dog toys. Almost all dogs like them, even small dogs like me. Ok, back to the sweatpants. The cheapest tug toy ever is super easy to find and I bet many of you haven’t even thought of it. The string on sweatpants is the best. You can also use the string on hooded sweatshirts. This works just as well and can be found on many unwilling people so you have to be sneaky. You act like you want to get all cuddly and snuggly and stuff (people love that), then you get in there and get the string and tug, tug, tug! Another cool thing about this is how the pants get all tight while you’re tugging. This may irritate the wearer of the sweat attire, but just keep tugging and don’t give up. I suppose if I ever got the entire string out of the pants it could mean another surgery for me. Yikes! You know the little hoodies that I wear don’t have those little strings on them. I wonder why!?


Chuck
Little Tug Boat


   video
   

Friday, March 28, 2014

MY BUD

One of my big dog friends is named Buddy. He recently had some weird bump on his shoulder. I am surprised that other dogs have medical issues other than me. I am usually the medical attention grabber and proud of it! However this time, it was all about Buddy.
Some of you have not met Dr. Nate Miller in my blog yet so here’s your introduction. He is a super great surgeon and really fits in well at Colorado Canine Orthopedics. I will admit that I wasn’t super nice to him at first and was a little bit Chucky snarky. You see I didn’t know him when he first joined the practice and I am not great when I first meet someone. I would see him and bark my fool head off.  It has taken me a little while to warm up to him and now that he helped my friend Buddy, I really like him a lot and will try not to bite him. He removed the bump on Buddy and did a really good job. I will be forever grateful for his surgery skills and thankful that he helped my friend. If I ever bark at Dr. Miller again, it will for sure be an accident.

Chuck

Barely Barking
My buddy, 'Buddy'…he doesn't usually look like this.
                   

Me and my new friend Dr. Miller…
look I'm not even barking or biting him…yet
.

Friday, March 21, 2014

Overeaters Anonymous

I guess it isn’t anonymous if I put it in my blog. I’m just wondering how many of you have overeaten and been a little bit bloated and maybe gassy and your stomach hurts and stuff. Last Thursday night, my Mom had put some food in my treat ball. The chunks were a little bit bigger than usual. She didn’t think anything about it, but the fact is that I don’t really chew my food. I inhale it. Well all of that food just sat in my belly and wow, what a bellyache! My Mom took one look at me and made a face of shock and horror. She thought that I looked like a little fat piglet. She took me to work with her the next day to visit the good Doctors at the Veterinary Specialty Center. They took an x-ray of my stomach and showed everybody! I was puffed up with food. Dr. Hines said that I had to go on food detox. No food for 24 hours. Can you believe it? This was very embarrassing for me as most people look up to me as an example of a well-behaved dog. At least it seems that way since people are always looking at me with a sort of amazed look and their mouths are open, kind of like they want to say something but just can’t find the words.  Now I look like a Chihuahua with an eating disorder. Before you make fun of me, I think that you should consider having an x-ray done of your stomach after eating Thanksgiving dinner. See, I am not the only one!

Chuck
The Bloated Blogger
This is my friend, Dr. Hines.
We hang out now and then while he's saving my life.

Friday, March 14, 2014

SPRINGTIME IN THE ROCKIES

So yesterday I went outside, frolicked in the sunshine, sniffed around and pooped. Today I go out for the same experience with lots of enthusiasm and I get outside and it is snowing. Not nice fluffy flakes, but wet and blowing yucky snow. It is impossible to poop under these conditions. I don’t know if you have ever tried to poop in wind blown wet snow, but it just can’t happen. I abandoned my intentions and ran back in the house. I did my usual pooping where I am not supposed to and accepted the yelling that followed with grace and dignity. I just don’t understand the weather in our lovely state of Colorado. I hear we have more sun than most other states, but do they get the whole ‘nice one day and snowy the next’. It makes it hard to make outdoor plans like pooping. When there is snow on the ground, my little feet get cold and I am pretty sure that my tail freezes in an upright position. I look forward to the summer months of sunbathing and frolicking outside and all of the other stuff that goes along with it.

Chuck
Snow Bunny
Mom I don't get it. You put clothes on me all the time,
now you toss me outside with not so much as a scarf.

Friday, March 7, 2014

CLOSET EATER

So this is not a figurative term. I really do eat in the closet. My separation from my other furry friends is due to the fact that I am not satisfied with eating JUST my food. I feel it is my responsibility to try everyone’s food to make sure that it is of the finest quality. OK, I really just want to steal everyone’s food cause I am a food motivated jerk. When I am in the closet I focus on my eating task at hand, but when I am finished my attention has been known to wander to other food possibilities. My parent’s should know better than to leave those bags of unopened dog food in the closet with me. It is then my duty to open the bags for the reason mentioned above. It is a scratching, biting and clawing frenzy to get it open before I am discovered. I am not always successful, but when I am it is totally worth all of the screaming and spankings that come after I have gobbled the goods. I think in a previous blog, I was able to blame this phenomenon on a mouse, but this time my Mom caught me “red pawed” so to speak. I don’t even know what that means really. If I were to go to court to try to defend myself, I would lose due to the incriminating evidence (Mom got a photo of me snarfing but I was just trying to help clean up the spilled food, I swear). Good thing it was worth it right?

CHUCK
Inmate #3754    
I was just reading the ingredient list when the bag just burst open.
Seriously, I've never seen anything like it before. This is a picture of me trying to keep all the tasty little crunchy pieces from spilling all over the floor.  

I think I need a 'pro-bono' lawyer here. I'm totally pro bones myself
but I'm not sure how I find a lawyer that is too….