Friday, September 23, 2016


A few weeks ago I wrote a blog about our new Doctors with a premonition that they would be giving me some ham since they are both so nice. Well, guess what? They brought me some ham with a note on top with MY name on it. I haven’t been this excited since the last time I ate through the dog food bag while my Mom wasn’t looking. I would like to eat all of the ham at one time, but my Mom is rationing it like we are stranded on an island and only have so much food before we run out. It is my ham. If I want to gorge on my gift, I think that should be my choice don’t you. Of course, I might get sick and end up in the ICU again…….Maybe we should ration my ham. Anyway, it is the best gift ever and it is good that my Mom will make me make my ham last longer. Please read that last sentence a few times. It really does make sense I promise!


Disciplined in Food Rationing


Friday, September 16, 2016


So I started this new thing that I do where I attack Lacey after we get our evening snacks. The purpose of this little show of bravado is to scare her away from any lingering snacks that she might have. I think this is a good tactic and sometimes I am rewarded with a little morsel. Now my Mom isn’t happy with this new behavior and has started using the squirt bottle on me. Can you believe that? She sprays me right in the face sometimes. This is not fair and I think that she needs to stay out of our little Chihuahua disputes. Lacey gets a little snarky when I do this so she is standing up for herself. Where is there harm in this new found spat? And the squirt bottle of all things. Why doesn’t she just yell like she usually does? I can easily ignore that, but the cold water hitting my delicate face is just too much. I will have to find a new way to sneak some extra snackage. After reading this blog, you could let my Mom know that the squirt bottle needs to be used on the big dogs only and not on little bitty helpless me!


Water Abused

Friday, September 9, 2016


So the Broncos are off and running…..literally. They actually picked a new Quarter Back and it wasn’t me. I am just a little bit offended, but the truth is they probably couldn’t afford my ham habit. They probably looked at their budget and added up the dollars it would take to keep me happy in ham and they just couldn’t do it. I guess I will watch the games and cheer them on because there is a strong chance that I will get some potato chips while watching the game. I want to keep the door open for my place on the team just in case they have a change of heart and really want me. It would be bad if I didn’t know all of the team stats or have a handle on all of the players. Just think how cool it would be if you turned on your TV one day for the big game and saw ME in my little helmet and puffy pants. The ratings would probably be so high that all of the teams would want me ham and all!


Ham Fan

Friday, September 2, 2016

MOO ON OVER.......

I am rethinking my choice of being a rooster. Some new information has come my way and I am re-evaluating my job opportunities and trying to make the best choice for me. I was looking across the street from my house and I noticed all of the cows happily munching away all day long. They are eating all the time and I thought to myself “I could do that!” Just think…. No breakfast or dinner, just one never ending extended buffet. Of course I wouldn’t be able to just eat grass. I was thinking more along the lines of ham with some other stuff thrown in there. Do cows eat ham? If they don’t, they probably should. Does it really matter what I eat? I could still be a cow and just change the menu a little bit. I would also be able to roam free and not worry about being chased down by one of my parents. I did not see any of the cows running away from there owners. There would be lots of space, freedom and food. I think this might be the answer to my little Chihuahua prayers. It is nice to know that someone is listening. Watch out cows, I am taking over the pasture.




Friday, August 26, 2016


Many of you know that any new Doctors in the Veterinary Specialty Center are required to be interviewed by me. Yes, you might not know this little secret, but I am the one who chooses these fine Doctors to make sure they fit in with our already excellent staff! I ask them many questions……

  • If I have an emergency situation, are you available exclusively for me?
  •    Just hypothetically, if I were to eat something that I am not supposed to eat like a rock or something, are you able to fix me up?
  •   What if I ingested too much food in one sitting, do you have something available that would make my tummy feel better?
  •    If I were to run around like a crazy idiot and I got a sore leg because of it, do you have some magic treatment that will make my legs really strong for a Chihuahua?
  •    If I were depressed, would you run to the store to buy me some ham?

 These are just a few of the questions on my list and each Doctor must answer those questions in a manner that pleases me and makes me confident of their ability to take care of me.
I am pleased to announce that Colorado Canine Orthopedics and Rehab has added two Doctors to our staff based on my recommendations. The cool thing is there are two of them with the same last name and they both really like me. The best part of their initiation process was the photo shoot! They got to get their picture taken with ME. This is the pinnacle for all of the Doctors in our building and it is an experience that they will never forget! Please welcome Dr. Mr and Mrs. DeTora. They come highly recommended by me!

Human Resource Director

And Question Asker

Friday, August 19, 2016


The other day when I was sleeping, I had a dream about my big break out, my big escape from the pen, my launch to freedom and then I woke up. There was a key on the floor right next to my pen. Could it be the key to my freedom? If I could just reach it, I bet I could use it to escape from my confinement with the girls or should I say my torment from the girls? I get stepped on and pushed and shoved with their tiny little feet and tiny little claws that dig right in since I don’t have much fur you know. I have to share water with them and my blanket. I think that they should have their own pen and I could be in solitary confinement. I would be ok with that but I try to think of what I would do if I could reach the key and escape…… Hmmmmmm 
I could run around like a crazy dog, annoying the big dogs by sniffing their under parts. I could run through the big yard like a crazed Chihuahua looking for stuff to chase. I could jump on all of the furniture until I found the place that I like the best and then pee on it. This all sounds pretty fun, but if I contemplate this further I realize that I would probably get eaten by one of the big dogs if I annoy them too much. I would probably be smaller than anything I might find to chase and I might break a leg or something if I jump on the furniture. I guess my little pen is the safest place for me to be and my pen mates aren’t that bad right? Maybe I could give one of them the key and say “here you go… have a good time!”


Safety First

Friday, August 12, 2016


Some of you may remember this lovely picture of me and my friend Becky sharing some love and a cup of coffee. Well after last week’s blog, I sent my friend Becky an e-mail requesting the opportunity to try out my rooster skills at her house. I asked if she needed my resume as I was applying for a job of sorts. Here is the response that I received.
Thank you for your inquiry.  We are not taking applications at this time. As you can see, I copied this directly from her e-mail response. My feelings are a little bit hurt right now and my little ego has been squished like a bug. We are friends right? Don’t friends give their friends a job if they ask for one? I am not asking to balance her checkbook, repair vehicles or clean her kitchen (unless there is food on the floor, then I might be interested in that job too) I simply want a little bit of support in my new career endeavor. I think that Becky should reconsider her cold professional response to this little Chihuahua friend of hers. Many of you know her and you could certainly contact her on my behalf. Remind her of all of the good times that we have shared. Like the time I peed in her office right after she took me outside. That was fun right? Then there was the time that I escaped from my Mom and ran right to Becky’s office knowing there was some love there waiting for me. Not feeling much love right now I can tell you that. If I were in her office right now I might do something more elaborate than just peeing. Use your imagination…..


Revenge Pooper