EXCLUSIVE REPORT!

LOOK HOW SNEAKY I AM! YOU CAN HARDLY TELL THAT I AM WATCHING!

It is hard to find time to be an investigative Chihuahua, but I somehow managed to dig up a scoop. Normally I would be napping or eating, but my curiosity got the best of me and I delayed my nap time by 5 whole minutes. I didn’t cut back on my food time cause I’m not a stupid dog, but the nap time was a huge sacrifice. It has come to my attention that my Mom is cheating on us. She won’t want me to tell you, but I feel like it is my obligation to report my household news as I see it. She is feeding the mice in the barn. Yes, you heard it here first! I heard her telling my Dad that if they are well fed and happy in the barn, they won’t come in to our house. She is feeding them Cheetos, potato chips and all kinds of stuff. So far, my ham seems to be safe, but I am keeping an eye on it just to be sure. Still, I might like some Cheetos for a mid-morning snack or maybe a chip or two could fall under my blanket. Maybe I need to start squeaking, eating electrical wires and running around in the cupboards? Or maybe not. What if I get sent to the barn to live with the mice? I am just going to kill this story right now before I get evicted and stuck in the smelly barn. Never mind.

CHUCK
Tampered Witness

SPRING CHICKEN

HAVE YOU SEEN SPRING YET? I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.

As I trudge through the snow in my chicken outfit, I am reminded that Spring is just around the corner. Which corner? I don’t know, maybe the one behind the giant snow drift. It seems unbelievable to me that there is warm weather on its way. Why is it waiting? Why can’t it come now? This cold and snowy stuff is upsetting to my delicate little paws. I would like to go outside more, but my feet are frozen as soon as I exit my house. Let alone other parts of my nearly hairless body. I need a full, fluffy, giant fleece parka with attached booties just to make a little run around my yard. I will keep looking for spring, but if you see it first, please tell it to come to my house please!

CHUCK
Sick of Winter!!!!!

THIS CHICKEN IS COLD!!!

I'M A WEE BIT SOMETHING....

For St. Patrick’s Day I could be a wee bit Irish, but I am more a wee bit naughty. Is there a day of celebration for naughtiness? It could be called St. Chuck’s Day. That is a good name and there could be hats and parties with outfits and stuff. There could be bars that have “Chuck Beers” and pretzels or maybe ham sandwiches. I for one would be in favor of such a holiday. There seems to be a special day for everything. There is National Donut Day, Pancake Day, Pie Day and a bunch of others that don’t even involve food. The non-food ones are really pointless! Anyway, if you are interested in Naughty St. Chuck’s Day, please call your local decision makers and tell them that you want ME to have my own holiday. 

HAPPY NAUGHTY ST. CHUCK'S DAY!
COULD YOU PLEASE BRING ME MY HAM SANDWICH OR BEER AND PRETZELS?

CHUCK
Top of the morning dog

DAYLIGHT SLEEPING TIME

Every year this catches me off guard. On one hand I am excited because breakfast will come sooner, but I am also bummed that my sleeping schedule will be disturbed. I am going to try to eat while I am sleeping and see if I can balance things out a bit. Sorry this Blog is so short, but I am losing an entire hour of my life. I must try to save up some sleep time!

CHUCK
Sleep Eater

CAN YOU SEE ME EATING? I KNOW, ME NEITHER!

WHAT MARDI GRAS MEANS TO CHUCK….

Everyone is so excited about the whole Mardi Gras thing, so I decided to make up my own reasons why it is special to me.

M = Me

HERE I AM WAITING FOR THE EXCITEMENT-
BUT I AM A LITTLE SLEEPY!

A = A lot of attention for Me

R = Really Cute (Me)

D = Did I tell you how cute I am?

I = It is all about Me!

G = Great (Me)

R = R you sick of me yet?

A = Already did this letter…

S = So where is my ham?

See how fun the celebration becomes when you make it more personal????

I AM NOW ASKING MY MOM IF I CAN HAVE
MY DINNER NOW? WITHOUT THE HAT......

SWEET SOOTHING SOUNDS....

While Chuck is sleeping, please enjoy the lovely sounds of the tiny bear in hibernation or the sleeping baby under the covers, or the soft noises of your spouse snoring next to you. These are some of the little noises in life that you must cherish and enjoy. They are peaceful like a flowing river or the gentle waves of the ocean. Perhaps the sounds of the forest with all of its little creatures making their own little noises. It might also be super irritating and annoying and might make you scream inside your head just a little bit. 

CHUCK
Hibernating Chihuahua

                               BE SURE TO HAVE THE VOLUME UP SO YOU CAN ENJOY 

                                              THE CHUCK MELODY OF ANNOYANCE!

LOVABLE FOR A DAY

Valentines Day is the day where you show people how much you love them. This is also a good day to show your dogs how much you love them too. We can be Valentines participants who are willing to trade a little smooch for a much- deserved treat. I can kiss on demand if there is something in it for me. I am willing to be totally lovey dovey if the reward is great enough. The other 364 days a year, not so much, but on Valentines Day, you bet! This year, I would like a heart shaped ham. I think that says it all….Don’t you? 

CHUCK
Not So True Romantic

IF I GIVE YOU A STUPID KISS, WILL YOU FILL UP THE PLATE AND THE GLASS WITH SOME HAM PLEASE!!!